


Drunken Fools

by tinypeckers



Category: Rooster Teeth/Achievement Hunter RPF
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-07
Updated: 2015-05-07
Packaged: 2018-03-29 12:18:54
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,274
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3896047
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tinypeckers/pseuds/tinypeckers
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A is drunk. B has to get A home safely because A is the kind of drunk who’ll pick a fight with anything and anybody. (Bonus OT3: C is also drunk shhhh.)</p>
            </blockquote>





	Drunken Fools

**Author's Note:**

> IT'S TWO KAY FIC TEEN  
> IT'S A THURSDAY  
> THIS IS UPLOADED TO AO3 LATER THAN IT WAS POSTED ON MY TUMBLR  
> TINYPECKERS.TUMBLR.COM  
> WHICH IS WHERE YOU CAN SEND ME PROMPTS
> 
> caps.

Ray had drawn the short straw, really. He’d been forced to be Michael and Gavin’s designated driver and yet they both knew that he hadn’t passed his test. He could not legally drive with either of them in a car, if he had even had one. So instead Ray had agreed to be their designated _walker_ instead. It limited their bar options but without Ray they might never make it home. It had been easy to sit at the bar and watch his boys get crazier and wilder as the night went on. Ray didn’t like to drink, his boyfriends respected that. Ray didn’t mind sitting at a bar with a book or more than likely his Nintendo 3DS console in his hands. He could ignore all the drunken idiots around him and the snide looks the bartenders would give him when he refused to buy a drink.

 

 

It was at the end of the night when things got messy. Michael, once the alcohol had settled in his body, often became very over protective of his boyfriends and in turn a very punchy person. He’d go for anyone who even dared to look in Gavin and Ray’s direction. Ray felt more like a father than a boyfriend when he had to scold Michael and hold him back from knocking out an innocent bystander. That wasn’t to say he was totally uncalled for, there were some leering jerks that Ray would turn a blind eye to when Michael raised his fists. The most memorable had been a large, beefy man who had dared to pinch Gavin’s ass. Ray had egged his boyfriend on then. It hadn’t ended well for anyone that night. They all ended up getting kicked from the bar and Michael and the stranger both shared quite a few bruises. Still, the stranger got the idea into his thick skull that Gavin was taken and that was that. It was a rare occurrence though that Ray actually liked Michael’s fighting nature.

 

 

Yet Gavin was just as bad. While he didn’t attempt to start fights or swing his way into hospital Gavin was just annoying. When he’d had too much to drink and Ray had to tell him to calm down or be quiet because god damn it, Gavin – people sleep here! Gavin would shake his head and protest.

“No,” Gavin would insist in that accent of his. It was often thicker when he wasn’t consciously trying to suppress it, “Ray, no I’m not drunk.” Gavin would say. Ray had to simply roll his eyes at Gavin’s denial. The Brit had no control of his feet when he was sober but when he was drunk he was much better off in a pushchair than being left to his own devices. Ray often found himself supporting his boyfriend’s weight when Gavin grew tired of carrying himself.

 

 

Tonight was not an exception to any other. Ray had dragged his boys out of the bar around two in the morning. He was tired, cranky and knew that the journey ahead of them would be a long one. Ray liked to pretend that Gavin and Michael made up the one ring and he was taking them to Mordor. Ray didn’t get to throw them into a giant pit of lava like he often found himself wanting at the end of a night out. He just got to throw them into their bed and tuck them in like little kids. It wasn’t nearly as climactic and Ray had convinced himself it wouldn’t make as good a movie franchise. Perhaps if he killed them at the end it would get better reviews, Ray mused.

 

 

“What’re you thinking of?” Gavin hiccupped as he hip-checked his youngest boyfriend. Ray stumbled as he startled. Stupidly he held onto Gavin for support. The two tripped together and Michael laughed as they almost fell off of the curb. Ray scowled at Gavin although really, he was also to blame. He should have been paying better attention. He was currently acting as babysitter rather than boyfriend. Ray shrugged.

“I’m just thinking about how I’m going to get your drunken asses home.” Ray teased.

“Oh hush, you love walking us home!” Gavin told Ray.

“Of course I do, it is so much fun making sure you don’t hurt yourself or in Michael’s case, hurt other people.” Ray snickered.

 

 

Michael was walking solemnly behind them. Ray could see how he was eyeing some poor bloke across the street. No doubt the man had simply glanced at the commotion they were having and Michael had completely misinterpreted it. To console him, Ray reached out and took his hand. Michael turned and spared him a simple smile before glaring at the man once more.

“Michael, leave it.” Ray warned. The guy was crossing the street now and looked to be heading to the nearby apartment lot. Michael disentangled his hand from Ray’s and began to march towards the poor guy. Ray huffed and ran after him.

“Hey, you!” Michael called out, “what do you think you’re looking at?” Michael barked. The man pulled a strange, terrified expression. As it became clear that Michael was talking to him he ran into the apartment complex Ray had thought that he’d lived in and slammed the door closed.

 

 

That did not deter Michael. He still continued to run in that direction. When he reached the door, he pounded upon it as if that alone would let him in. Ray caught up, eventually, and put himself between the door and his boyfriend. Michael glowered at him when he realised he couldn’t knock on the door without knocking on Ray’s face too.

“Move.” Michael meant to sound commanding but it came out as a whine instead.

“No you are not beating up some poor, innocent man.” Ray said. Michael pouted. “That’s cute but no.” Ray added in a voice reserved for babies. He pinched Michael’s pout and the older man backed off.

“Fine, I’ll get him next time.” Michael declared. Ray nodded and patted Michael’s shoulder.

“Of course you will, babe.” Ray reassured.

 

 

Gavin had been waiting surprisingly obediently where Ray had left him.

“Wow, for once you were a responsible drunk.” Ray commended as he and Michael caught back up. He took Michael’s hand and slipped his hand into Gavin’s as well to make sure that neither of them strayed from him. They were on the home stretch now, barely a block from their home.

“I’m not drunk.” Gavin protested. Ray didn’t bother to argue, there was no point.

“Oh, of course not.” Ray muttered.

“Yes you are.” Michael giggled. Gavin shook his head.

“I am not drunk.” Gavin insisted. Michael only laughed at him again.

“It doesn’t matter because look, there’s our apartment block. Now we can all go home and sleep.” Ray cheered. It was all he had wanted after such a tiring night.

 

 

“Woohoo!” Gavin and Michael cheered. Ray knew that they probably would not just go home and sleep. In fact they’d probably drink more. It didn’t matter because Ray would no longer have to look after them. They were home and so long as he locked the door and hid the keys, Gavin and Michael wouldn’t get themselves into too much trouble. Ray could rest.

“Hey Ray?” Michael asked as they opened the door to the apartment block.

“Hm?” Ray answered.

“Will you be able to be our designated walker next week?” Michael giggled. Ray sighed.

“Of course.” Ray agreed. It seemed a hero’s job was never over. Ray sighed – he’d just have to protect the drunken people from themselves for yet another night. All in a night’s work.


End file.
